That One Time I Was a Drug Rep: A Tale of Type 2 Diabetes and Erectile Dysfunction

Dear Readers,

Today I would like to share the story of that one time I was a Drug Rep.  In summary:  It's a tale of Type 2 Diabetes and Erectile Dysfunction.
  

Yesterday I blogged about:  The Iowa Caucus, Kim Kardashian, and The Sugar Bowl.  Today it's ED and Diabetes.  Clearly this blog is lacking some focus.

I recently have come to a career crossroads and have decided to switch teams.  I'm coming from a world of Pharmaceutical Drug Rep-ping and Medical Device Sales...to Counseling.  

I fully realize this is kind of an odd transition.  And not very traditional.  Actually, nothing I have ever done could be considered "traditional".  So, I'm not going to start now.

 Impala.

So let's get into it.  The story of Erectile Dysfunction, Diabetes, and why I carried a trunk load insulin, syringes, and ED pills around with me for a couple years in my standard issued Drug Rep Chevy Impala.    

Oh and yes, I realize by writing this blog I may never be welcome back and or embraced in the pharmaceutical community.  And I'm ok with that.  I'm pretty sure they'll get along alright without me.  Actually, I think since I've been out of the game they have continued to make money.  I'm not sure.  I'd have to look it up.  Let's just say for the purpose of this specific story that the Pharmaceutical industry is still profitable, despite me no longer being a part of it.

Being a "Drug Rep" was probably the strangest and most awkward job I've ever had.  And I've had A LOT of jobs.  I've been working since I was 14...and therefore have had a bunch of jobs in my career.

My very first job was at a trap and skeet range.  That served alcohol.  So...Guns, bullets, and booze.  I I was 14.  I didn't have a work permit...as they ran their business with minors working for cash under the table.  True story.  You can ask my mom.

I've also been a Resident Assistant (RA) in college for sixty co-ed undergraduates.  (That's a whole different blog post in itself.)  I could write probably 100 blog posts on the stories I have from being an RA in college...

Still, the Drug Rep gig overrides all other previous jobs...In terms of levels of awkwardness.  Mainly because for two years I had to talk about nothing but straight up Erectile Dysfunction and Type 2 Diabetes.

I have to give the Pharma industry some major props.  They educate their representatives as if we were scientists.  Ask me anything about ED or Diabetes.  I can guarantee I know the answer.  I don't know much about most things.  But I do know a lot about a few things.  And those things are ED and Diabetes.  I went through weeks and months of extensive training.  I've probably read more research studies than I knew ever existed.  I know my stuff.  And I can thank Big Pharma for that one.  What will I do with this information??  I don't know.  Probably blog about it. 

Let's get one thing straight:  I'm not knocking the business.  I'm just saying it's not for me.  I know A LOT of Drug reps out there.  Most of them love their jobs.  And I love when people love what they do.  I just happened to not love that job and therefore decided to go a different path.

Let's get another thing straight:  Erectile Dysfunction and Type 2 Diabetes are legitimate and serious medical conditions.

When I started in the Pharma industry I did so because I was/am super passionate about Type 2 Diabetes.  My grandfather (and also the greatest man I've ever known) died of complications from Diabetes.  My goal when entering this specific line of work was to do my part and help individuals educate themselves about Diabetes.  And I did that.  But I wasn't able to help in the way that I wanted.  It was very regulated and it was hard to tell if I was making an impact (besides sales).

It ended up not being what I wanted it to be.  The job that is.

Anyway, it was two years of weird conversations.  In both my professional and personal life.

You know how people ask what you do for a living??  Naturally, if you tell someone you are a Drug Rep, they're going to ask you what drugs you rep for.  And telling people about Erectile Dysfunction sometimes makes them feel uncomfortable.  Also, insulin is a little tricky.  Mainly, because it involves refrigeration, ice packs, coolers, syringes, and a bunch of needles.

So with this job I was not only shipped hundreds and hundreds of boxes of ED pills on a weekly basis, but also coolers of insulin.  In addition to a Chevy Impala showing up one day I was also issued:  a cooler the size of the trunk of my car, approximately 40 ice packs, another cooler, A REFRIGERATOR, and probably 100 boxes of literature/pens/crap.

Have you ever had a refrigerator for your job??  It's kind of a weird thing to have in your home office.  Needless to say, I had entire rooms of my house that were stacked with boxes and boxes of pharmaceutical paraphernalia.  And the refrigerator.

My decision to leave the industry wasn't because of the massive amount of stuff that I had to have in my house, in my car, and on my person at all times...it was the traveling.

Now, I LOVE traveling.  I absolutely love it.  What I don't love is traveling for weeks at a time and being on the road all the time.  I missed out on a lot of things.  I've been traveling for my career ever since I graduated from college.  I was on the road or on a plane for eight years straight.

Here's an Actual Schedule of My Former Life:

• Sunday:  leave Des Moines International (ha!) airport and fly out to Chicago.  Meet up with my Director for dinner and drinks.  Get to some random hotel.  Check email for a couple of hours.  Go to bed at 3am.
• Monday:  Wake up at 5am.  Meet my counterparts for a breakfast meeting.  Then an 8am presentation in downtown Chicago.  Talk for 4 hours.  Fly out of Chicago at 4pm, back to Des Moines.  Have the plane delayed and end up back in Des Moines at 10pm instead of 5pm.  Get back home, check email/voice mail for a couple hours, find some clean clothes, go to bed at 3am.
• Tuesday:  Wake up at 5am.  Drive to Omaha, Nebraska for an all day meeting.  Go to dinner with clients.  Drive home at 10pm.  Check emails/voicemail.  Go to bed at 2am.
• Wednesday:  Wake up at 4am.  Get to the airport at 6am.  Fly out to Colorado for another meeting.  Fly back home the same day.  Print a bunch of stuff off for the meeting in Oklahoma tomorrow.  Leave for Oklahoma at 5pm.  Get to Oklahoma at 1am.  Try to find my hotel for the next hour.  Get to hotel at 2am.  Check emails/voicemail for a couple hours.  Go to bed at 4am.  
• Thursday:  Get up at 6am for a meeting at 8am.  More meetings and presentations.  Get home at 2am Friday morning.
• Friday:  Get up at 5am.  Conference call at 8am while driving to Cedar Rapids, Iowa.  Get to Cedar Rapids at 10am and do an all day training.  Get home at 6pm.  Check emails and voicemail until midnight.  On a Friday night.  All my friends are out doing things that young 20 somethings do.  My former domestic partner patiently waits to see my face.  I pass out at midnight.
• Saturday:  I hibernate until noon.  Run errands, hit the bank, go to the dry cleaners, do laundry, hit up Target, call my mom.  See my former domestic partner.
• Sunday:  Pack, clean my house, and get back on a plane by 5pm to do the same thing all over again.

I did this for eight years more or less.  Sometimes the travel involved more driving.  Sometimes it was more flying. At any rate, I don't remember sleeping.  I was always working.  Always.  I'd get calls in the middle of the night.  If I had to approximate, I got 100-200 emails a day that needed answered.  Did I make good money?  Yes.  Was it worth it?  No.  Not to me.  You can't put a price on your sanity.  You also can't put a price on what your personal time is worth.  Let's face it, I'm 30.  One day, I'd like to be a mom.  Of actual real live children.  I'd also like to be in the same area code as my said children...I don't know...Just in case they needed their mother?  For mom-type stuff.  I'd rather not be stuck snowed in for four days straight in Sioux City, Iowa with no possibility for escape (true story).  
  
I've also always worked from a home office.  And I kind of am sick of working with only myself.  I would like to have actual co-workers.  After a while of working with only myself, I started to become annoying to myself.  I need a break from me.

So at any rate, that one time I was a Drug Rep and sold ED meds and insulin was a little different.  I have many many stories about that job...However, I think I may keep most of them to myself.  I am a little scared of the Pharma industry.  They have a lot of lawyers.  And I think some money to go with their legal representation.

I was cleaning my garage the other day...and came across boxes upon boxes of ED pens...and that's what prompted me to write this post.  On a side note:  If anyone would like several boxes of ED pens/highlighters just let me know.  I could have that arranged.

And this concludes the story of that one time I was a Drug Rep.

Let's Reflect, What Have We Learned?

• I once was a Drug Rep.
• Talking about Erectile Dysfunction makes some people uncomfortable.
• Someday I would like to have actual real live children.  
• I have a bunch of boxes of pens I would like to get rid of.  

So, I Ask You?
What's the strangest job you've ever had??  Does talking about ED make you uncomfortable??  Do you want a bunch of boxes of pens??



Forever, Blogging About Stories of My Life You Never Knew You Wanted To Know About In The First Place,
Miss Oakley


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