How to Make, Keep, and Achieve a Goal: Keeping Your New Year's Resolution

Dear Readers,

Goals are good. Evidence: Everything.

I heart goals.

We get to where we want to be in life by setting goals and sticking with them.

Today is Monday, and a week after the New Year. I thought it would be a great time to discuss the best ways to keep our New Year's Resolution's.

Although I am talking about a New Year's Resolution...this blog is really for anyone that has ever made a goal for themselves.

Having a goal is the first step to making a change in your life. However, often times we are vague with our goals and they lack a clear plan. Lacking a clear plan for our goals, cause them to be far off and not within our grasp. We have the best intentions when we create goals for ourselves. The thought process that goes into goal creation is a clear indication that we have realized that there needs to be a change in our life. Where we fall short most of the time, is putting together a small, achievable, and measure plan to achieve our goals.

A New Year's Resolution is the epitome of the goal creation process. It is also the best example that I can think of to share with you on how goals are thoughtfully created, however, not followed through with. The reason we do not follow through, is not because we do not wish to achieve something. It is because we lack a clear plan.

How many years have you come up with a well intentioned New Year's Resolution? Only for life to get in the way, and therefore, your goal to be put on the back burner?  It doesn't even have to be a New Year's Resolution...How many times have you said: "I'm going to start doing _____." Or, I'm going to change ______ about myself."

I don't know about you...But for me, this has happened often. So many times in fact, that a couple of years ago, I stopped making New Year's Resolutions all together.

This year, I decided to go back to making Resolutions. Mine being: to write more. So here I am, writing more. What you are reading, is my resolution. This blog makes me accountable. (Which will be discussed later.)

With this blog post, my goal is to set the story straight: Goals can work you for. The secret to goal setting is to create a plan that includes STEPS to reach those goals. In addition to steps, you need to make yourself ACCOUNTABLE. The final key to a successful goal is: EVALUATION of that goal.

It is that simple. And it works. I can tell you it works, because I've seen it work. And I'm doing it myself. And it's working.

STEPS Defined:
Steps help break down your goal. For example: If your New Year's Resolution is to workout more: What does that even mean? What does working out "more" mean? Your goal needs to be defined. You could set your workout goal to something like: every other day, X times a week, X times a month, etc.

If your New Year's Resolution was to be be a better: friend/sister/brother/aunt/co-worker/spouse/ect...What does that really mean? What does being "better" mean? You could break being "better" down. Maybe that means you call 2 people a week on the phone, just to talk. Or you set a monthly friend/spouse date. Or, you write a hand written letter to an aging grandparent each week.

If your New Year's Resolution was to get a better job/advance in your career...You need to state what that really means to you. If you want a better job, you are going to have to go after it. Getting a better job does not just happen. You need to network, get yourself out there. You could re-state your goal and say that you are going to network and reach out to 2 different people a week. Or apply at two different jobs a week. Or you could say that you are going to spend 15 minutes a day searching for jobs. Break that large goal of "A Better Career" into something that is more bite-size and achievable. 15 minutes a day is do-able. A goal of a life changing career...Not so doable on a daily basis.

What I'm really saying here is that you need to make your goals SMALLER. I know that sounds silly, but smaller and more achievable goals really do work better in the long run.

Saying you are going to workout "more", or be a "better" friend/spouse/etc , or have a more rewarding career is rather vague. And not really measurable. Putting numbers, or something that is more quantifiable is the easiest way to break down a large goal.

One way I break large, lofty goals down is to the daily-doable basis. What can I do once a day, to get to my goal? If you focus on doing just one thing a day that leads you towards your end goal...it does not seem that overwhelming.

A good way to set your priorities is to ask yourself: "Is what I'm doing on a daily basis moving me towards my goal?" If the answer is no, you need to re-evaluate your daily habits.

You may know the story of the comedian Jerry Seinfeld. When he was coming up in the comedy world, he set the goal of writing one joke a day. Each day that he wrote a joke, he put an "X" on the calendar. Instead of focusing on being "The World's Best Comedian", he focused on not breaking the chain of "X's" on his calendar. And it worked. He's one of the most successful comedians of all time.

My point being: do one thing each day that aligns with your overall goal for yourself. Focus on doing that one thing a day. Not on the huge, overwhelming ultimate goals. If you focus on the smaller, and more achievable goal...Before you know it, you will be well on your way to reaching your ultimate goal. Soon the small, daily-doable tasks, have turned into habits. And those habits have created change. And change is what is needed in order to achieve goals.

ACCOUNTABILITY Defined:
Making yourself accountable is also important. Accountability is what keeps us going after our goal, even when life becomes hard. Now, do you have to shout your goal from the rooftops?? No. But, you need to tell someone. Even if that someone is yourself. I know it sounds silly, but having a real and open conversation with yourself sometimes is what stands between you and successfully achieving your goal. I am speaking about this from self experience. I know for me, I am what stands in between either my success or my failure. No one else.

For other people, it works best if they tell another person. Or a group of people about their goal. Sometimes it is not the accountability that is what is important. Sometimes, it is the SUPPORT SYSTEM that is the result of the accountability that counts. Having other people that are in your corner generally helps. Knowing you have a support system that is there for you, will help keep you moving towards your goal.

EVALUATION Defined:
Goals need to be re-examined from time to time. Often times, they may need to re-adjusted to fit with where your life is at now. It is good to re-examine your goal and to adjust your plans as necessary. Sometimes our life changes. And with that change, should come a re-adjustment of the steps in order to reach our goals. There are times that our lives change so much, that our entire goals need to changed in order to honor the change that is occurring in our lives.

Evaluations of our actions is often the best indicator of whether or not we are on track to meet our goal. Essentially, what we are doing on a daily basis is aligned with our larger goal. It is the things that we do each day, that get us to where we want to be.

RESISTANCE TO CHANGE MAY OCCUR:
It is important to note that with goals, sometimes comes change...and with Change, often comes resistance. Resistance can be in many forms. Often it happens in the form of self-sabotage. Self-sabotage is anything that you personally do that keeps you from achieving your goal. I will blog more about sabotage later. The important thing to note, is that resistance to change is natural. And when it happens, embrace that resistance. It means, that change is occurring.

MY GOAL/RESOLUTION Defined:
My overall life-goal is to help others. I am doing this by going grad school to become a Counselor. On a smaller scale, I have set a goal for 2013: On a daily basis I have decided to write and share my writings with others. Blogging daily is breaking down a larger goal to smaller, achievable pieces. I take time out of every day to write. Even if it is just for 15 minutes. I turn that writing into a blog. I have shared my overall vision with my friends and family. Also, I've shared in on many social media platforms. By me sharing my goal with others (and being honest with myself), I have made myself accountable. Evaluation is something that I plan on doing from time to time. I know it will become harder to keep up writing daily. Life will get in the way. I will just take it day by day. Writing for 15 minutes a day, is not overwhelming. And when life gets overwhelming, I will just tell myself that I can always take 15 minutes to write. The small daily tasks of writing each day will turn into a habit. The habit formation is what is needed for real change to happen. Once change occurs, I will naturally blog once a day. This will make NOT blogging once a day seem un-natural eventually. Eventually, I will reach my goal of blogging and writing every day. The goal I have for 2013, aligns with my overall goal of: helping others.

Thank you for reading. Little do you know, that by you reading my blog, it is helping me with my overall goal. So, thank you. Thank you for keeping me accountable. Thank you for all the emails, tweets, comments, follows, shares, texts, messages, and phone calls regarding this blog. You keep me accountable. And accountability is all part of the goal-achievement process.

If you have a goal and would like to discuss breaking it down into smaller pieces...I'd love to assist you. Please just reach out to me. I love, no I LIVE, to help others. Reaching out to me would not be a burden. If fact, it probably would make my day.

Cheers to a New Year and to Setting and Achieving our Goals,
Miss Oakley

Other Related Posts:
Invest in You
My "To Done" List
My Life Is What I Give It The Power To Be

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