"Normal" is a word that gets thrown around a lot.
It's used to describe everything from relationships to what we have having for dinner.
It's also a word I strongly dislike.
The reasons for my dislike are many. Mainly, it is because using "normal" is yet another way we compare ourselves to our ideal of what is accepted in society.
Also, there is nothing that is "normal." Everything, everyone, and every situation is unique.
Your definition of "normal" and the "normal" of another person could be completely different.
For example: The "normal' work weeks of the following four people:
Person 1: works 40 hours a week, Monday through Friday. This is their normal.
Person 2: works 60 hours a week, 7 days a week. This is their normal.
Person 3: works 32 hours a week, on weekends only and at night. This is their normal.
Person 4: works part time at two jobs, hours and days vary. This is their normal.
Each person in the above example has their own "normal." Yet, their "normal" is not in line with any other person's.
Here is another example of a "normal" gym schedule for the following four people:
Person 1: Works out Mon, Wed, Fri after work. This is their normal.
Person 2: Does not work out, takes the stairs when they can. This is their normal.
Person 3: Works out twice a week. This is their normal.
Person 4: Works out every day in the morning. This is their normal.
What I am trying to get you to see, is that "normal" for one person, does not translate to "normal" to another person. "Normal", therefore, is an internal and personal definition. Not an outward one to judge ourselves against.
So, why do we then compare ourselves to other's "normal" when everyone's "normal" is different and unique to their situation??
My challenge to you is to re-define "normal." When you use it to define yourself, you are actually comparing and therefore, restricting yourself to the definition of what another person/society holds.
Society tries to make us fit into neat little "normal" boxes. And this just does not work. Humans are very unique and no two people are alike.
I challenge you to stop and think about your use of the word "normal." When you find yourself using it...expand on your definition. What are you really trying to say by using the word "normal"? What does "normal" mean to you?
I myself do not use the word "normal" at all. Ever. For any reason. Typing this post is the first time I've written/said it in years. To me, "normal" is restrictive and counterproductive to our growth. We do not move forward when we compare ourselves to self-imposed standards of society. In order to move forward we need to be our unique selves. And that comprises a variety of situations and life experiences.
There is no "normal." There are only unique people in unique situations, dealing with the task of living life.
Miss Oakley
Please feel free to share, comment, and ask questions!
On twitter? Me too! https://twitter.com/MissOakley
Amazing article. i have been trying to substitute actual adjectives to describe what I am trying to reference as the word normal. So for instance I would say, well I am wearing this outfit which is not "normal." Instead I try to say I am wearing this outfit, which is different than my usual outfit of jeans and a t-shirt. This way I don't confuse myself to think that it is only "common" to wear jeans and a t-shirt and anything that differs from that is wrong... Thank you for this... Reaffirming that I am okay with me...
ReplyDelete